Unbidden

I forget sometimes.

Where I’ve put what,

Why I’m here in this room.

I go back out to where I began,

Remember.

Then I resume

 

To get on with what’s what,

Make a list of whatnot,

Take it with me so I won’t forget

To buy what is needed

For life to go on,

Still something will be missing, you bet.

 

I’ll try to recall

Why something is irking,

Just what I’ve forgotten to do,

Then thoughts will return,

I’ll be back in this room

And remember all about you.

 

Some things I forget,

The ordinary of life,

Minutiae, out of my mind.

Sublimate others, try to forget,

Resolve not to list,

Some peace so to find.

 

Ageing, my dear,

Is that what this is,

A memory all too long past?

Or does time play tricks on

What felt so real

But never was destined to last?

 

A scary confusion,

Life battered,

Illusion,

Dimly lit

Portraits of prior,

Acknowledged

In memories,

Never forgotten,

Resurface unbidden,

Conspire

To addle the brain

Live history again,

Rejuggle the words,

Recognise the absurd,

Fantasies gleaned from before.

Yesterday’s days

Should remain just a haze,

A myth, merely folklore.

 

Forgetting’s an art

Not an accident, no,

A deliberate longing for peace.

To recall unwittingly

Is torment for sure,

Destined to know no surcease.

 

So lists all in hand,

We jot what we need

To enjoy the now, day to day.

Rip up the old,

Discard what is gone,

Smile and go on, come what may.

15 thoughts on “Unbidden”

  1. I do like this…and I must say this very morning I walked into my study and stood in the doorway…asking what did I come here for… then I went back to where I thought of it, walked back down…nah nothing..it was lost in the abyss….so yes ageing…. 😦

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    1. Strange, I find, that I do that and yet recollect full conversations from years ago. And people’s faces pop into mind as if it were yesterday since they’d last been seen instead of donkeys years ago. November must be the month for remembering, right enough. Except what you went into a room for. ;)x

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    1. Yes, I was finding myself remembering all sorts of people and my mum was one of them, like it was only a minute ago since I’d spoken to her. Weird thing the memory. Or lack of it, at times. ;)x

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  2. Bless you for writing this!! I get so paranoid when I forget thinking I am prematurely getting to be like my mom (bless her soul but still…) you write so beautifully…I wish I had half your vocabulary.

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    1. I think we all do it to some extent or other. Too many other things going on in mind so the obvious stuff gets relegated to the cupboard. 😉
      Thank you for your lovely words. I just have always loved words. I get all excited when I find a new one that I’ve never heard before. Sad in a way. :)x

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