So Twindaddy wants to know which song I associate with my last ex-boyfriend.
Slight problem.
My last ex- boyfriend is my husband of nearly 27 years. How did that happen? Don’t ask me. I was enjoying the rollercoaster at the time.
Every time.
Every. Single. Time.
From that first meeting.
Every time you looked.
Came near.
Dared to speak.
Every time.
The possibility.
I clenched,
knuckles white,
rode the slow ride,
a semi-death,
anticipating climax
in descent.
Every single time.
A fairground attraction.
Deathly fear in
chamber of horrors
that today,
this moment,
would be
the last today.
Waltzers spinning…..
…..whirling mind…..
wondering,
Is this love?
Then we would ride
rollercoaster.
Up, Up, Up!
Neverending upness…..
…..till that peak.
A descent of
Was this love?
I wondered.
I queried.
I asked
of someone,
anyone.
Was this love?
I begged for answers
to an inevitable future.
No right or wrong way
of reckoning.
I wondered.
I queried.
I dismissed.
We paused.
We dated again;
the question ever present.
Was this love?
Was this
Animal?
We talked.
Is this love?
I heard her then.
Asking my questions…..
…..in a pub…..
…..in Glasgow.
And I asked,
Is this love?
We looked.
Paused forever
over
possible ever
or never.
And married
six months later.
scottishmomus 