F This (may cause offense to delicate sensibilities or anyone younger than em, 12 maybe?)

Can’t we all be f#*°®¥°*¢ friends

As birds that f#*°¢ together

F*°«~*’s such a better choice

If we all had f¢¥* f#*°®¥°#


I used to couldn’t swear, it’s true,

Erupted just instead,

Blessed myself and wondered why

Couldn’t even curse in head,

Then thought a bit about some words

And joy of all behold,

Realised perception’s worth,

I practised, grew quite bold.

Didn’t say them when they caused

Any deep offense,

Didn’t say them to my dad,

You’re joking, not that dense.

But found that words like feck and fuck

And shit and sod and damn

Kept volcanic in its place,

Accursed sort of dam.

Use them sometimes as a laugh,

Some jokes just need that jest,

Other times I use them, well,

Hubby knows those best.

Found a fuck to give right here,

Well many, just be warned,

Fucks aplenty, no asterisks,

But, with humour, lessons learned.

Haven’t counted but I know

There are fucks galore

But funny fucks and useful fucks,

I’m keeping some in store.

Only one that I can’t see

Is one I wrote at first ^^^^

Flying fucks from feathered friends

With not a single curse.

Symbols might suggest there’s more

Than merely letters missed

We fill the blanks in anyway

So no censorship for this.



14 thoughts on “F This (may cause offense to delicate sensibilities or anyone younger than em, 12 maybe?)”

  1. Ah that was feckin great! Feck is such an ordinary everyday word here in Ireland and can be said anywhere at any time, getting us out of saying fuck, but with the same feeling. Feck, fecker, for fecks sake. It can be very derogadory or friendly depending on the subject.
    Having said that if I really want to annoy my OH who hates cursing I can quietly walk up to him and with feeling say, ‘Fuck… Off’.


    1. It’s a great stress buster. I’m more likely to be cursing the mess someone’s, yet again, left behind them and give it, ‘Aw, for feck’s sake! Does no basturt in this house know where anything goes? Shower of dirty sods!’ If they hear me at it the response is almost immediate from every quarter and all I was doing was venting.
      The quiet curse is very effective. My eldest brother used to call it ‘my special occasion’ curse becuse I once used it on him before I ever really swore. A really drawn out from the inside, a very low, ‘You fuuuuckkkiiing baaaastaaard!’ Totally stopped him in his tracks, gob open. Very liberating and only used on special occasions when someone has really crossed the line. Recipients now recognise the difference between my pissed off curses and my, ‘oh,god, she’s serious’ ones. Feck’s great though. Can use that just about anywhere. Maybe not staff meetings. Well, not till afterwards. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I must admit, Chris, I hate to hear gratuitous swearing from anyone, young ones particularly, and especially if it’s directed at anyone but, in its place, mostly humorously or to vent, it serves a purpose like most language. There are still one or two I never use. Just can’t bring myself to say them and cringe if I hear them. But I can’t tell you what they are. Even thinking them offends me.


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