Joker’s Wild

You play first among equals

And I’ll play second fiddle in the back

You be the straight guy

And I’ll be your sidekick

For human touch and humour that you lack

I’ll do the wisecracks and you do what’s bidden

And we’ll have them rolling in the aisles

You do the poker face

While I pull the funnies

And confound them with laughter heard for miles

You be the bad guy and I’ll be the hero

Waiting in the wings to save the day

It’s all in the timing

The tokens and the teamwork

A Johnson joke and Fawltied Theresa May

You be the arsehole and I’ll be the bumfart

Farts get laughs

While arses take the blame

You do the lead-up and I will deliver

It’s all in the nature of the game

You play elections and I’ll play the long game

Joker’s wild, related to the face

You be the knackered

And I’ll be the thoroughbred

Snorting at the finish of the race

You play first among equals

And I’ll play second fiddle to a bro

You be the rebound

While we guys regroup and practice

For the sequel of the bloody Brexit show

 

You do the guesswork and I’ll do imagine

Who’s unusually quiet, writing lines

You do geometry

And I’ll do arithmetic

And calculate the odds of signs and times

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