From Whence I Came

In a moment

I will be accepted

Or rejected.

I want to be affirmed

As part of the family

Of God

From whence I came.

Prior to conception

I sat in His presence

Awaiting the call

To human life.

I bring joy to the faces

Of those I call parents

But I know

From whence I came.

Baptise me now

I need the grace

To go through this earthly life.

Those who tend me

May or may not

Have the faith to build me

And make me aware

In the years when I forget

But just now I know

From whence I came.

Until the call Home

Comes

And I remember

The face of the One

I will forget.

I need His help now

For what lies ahead

Confirm my present awareness.

For when I look far away

Into the corners of rooms

And they ask sweetly if I see fairies

I wish I could tell them

And make them know

That I see the face

Of the One

From whence I came.

So please don’t deny me

My baptism of love

Because my parents have doubts.

I do not need their faith

I do not need mine

For I know

From whence I came.

(29-10-1997)

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Baptism

His eyes looked kindly on me

His tenderness sublime

His presence is my heaven

All this already mine.

I wish to rest amid this joy

And never here depart

But the earthly call will lead me on

And test my wounded heart.

For a while I will remember

All that I here hold dear

But life will overtake me

And fill my heart with fear.

My loving Father calls me

And sends me on my way

‘Work for humankind, my child

And then come home to stay.’

I long to hold his hand to mine

And ask simply to remain

But to stay without being tested

Just would not be the same.

The grace I feel within his sight

I cannot live without

I fear my absence from his face

Will fill my life with doubt.

At first the loss is just too great

I look for what is gone

In distant corners of a room

The pain of being born.

Time moves on and healing comes

In love that tends my needs

The knowledge goes and doubts creep in

Despite the hand that feeds.

I need God’s grace to run this race

I need His presence near.

I cannot face this life without

His voice within my ear.

The emptiness of life without

A God to call your own

Is filled with frantic moments

Faith has not been sown.

Baptise me as an infant

When my knowledge is still here

Plant a seed that I can cherish

When my heart is filled with fear.

I will doubt and I will wander

While I sojourn on this earth

But I will have a gift from God

To help me on my path.

And when I can return to Him

As, God I pray I will,

He will smile upon me

And with tenderness me fill.

The longing that I knew at birth

Will circle once around

Till home at last I am with Him

Home from testing ground.

Without His grace along the way

I fear I would have lost

The greatest love I’ve ever known

The hell of such a cost.

(3-3-05)