I am seriously looking for a diet that incorporates vast quantities of chocolate.
I imagine I will find it if I google, ‘A Woman’s Best Friend’ or ‘Diets Women Die For’.
Somewhere, out there, in this wonderful, wide world some chemist or researcher of some sort has come up with a chocolate diet that, if followed, leaves women svelte-like and minus a chocolate moustache.
I imagine that if it’s a man his misogynistic and sadistic tendencies are causing him to withhold the secret until we have suffered enough.
I imagine that if it’s a woman she’s a bitch of the first order and is cackling away, in a lab lined with Lindt, while sporting a pair of hot pants and a halter top worn braless.
I imagine that if I ever get my hands on either of them I will throttle the life from their skinny bodies until every ounce of chocolate they have consumed is lying in a puddle at their feet.
I imagine I’m not the only one who’s searching for this diet.
Inspiration comes in many guises.