May Music, Day 2 – Fairground Attraction

So Twindaddy wants to know which song I associate with my last ex-boyfriend.

Slight problem.

My last ex- boyfriend is my husband of nearly 27 years. How did that happen? Don’t ask me. I was enjoying the rollercoaster at the time.

Every time.

Every. Single. Time.

From that first meeting.

Every time you looked.

Came near.

Dared to speak.

Every time.

 

The possibility.

I clenched,

knuckles white,

rode the slow ride,

a semi-death,

anticipating climax

in descent.

 

Every single time.

A fairground attraction.

 

Deathly fear in

chamber of horrors

that today,

this moment,

would be

the last today.

 

Waltzers spinning…..

 

…..whirling mind…..

wondering,

Is this love?

 

Then we would ride

rollercoaster.

Up, Up, Up!

Neverending upness…..

…..till that peak.

 

A descent of

 

Was this love?

 

I wondered.

I queried.

I asked

of someone,

anyone.

Was this love?

 

I begged for answers

to an inevitable future.

No right or wrong  way

of reckoning.

 

I wondered.

I queried.

I dismissed.

We paused.

 

We dated again;

the question ever present.

Was this love?

Was this

Animal?

 

We talked.

Is this love?

 

I heard her then.

Asking my questions…..

…..in a pub…..

…..in Glasgow.

 

And I asked,

Is this love?

 

We looked.

Paused forever

over

possible ever

or never.

And married

six months later.

 

 

Who Knows?

Who cares

To renew

A good man?

Who shares

A point of view?

Who wonders at

Right

Or woeful deceit?

Who knows

What

Right

From the wrong?

Who knows what heart lies

Needing?

Who knows where

Urgency

Is met?

Who knows why

Souls

Are confounded

Or why

One look

Makes

The wet

Of desire

And fulfilment

A goal

To achieve,

A

Something

Unexplained

 

That no one believes?

 

Who knows

These things?

Not I.

X-Rated

Breaths combined, eyes locked, allured,

Inches far apart,

Rising tide of wanting,

Neither one may start.

 

Passion builds with waiting

And heated hands do twitch

Reach out to touch, envelop,

Take fever to its pitch.

 

The look now broken by a thought,

A glance away to press the urge.

Look once more into the soul,

Feel the aching surge.

 

Now lean to kiss, the slightest touch,

With promises of more.

A tantalising taste of honey,

Shivers to the core.

 

And all at once, the dam has burst,

And hunger’s needs are met,

Falling to the rising tide

And drenched in wettest sweat.

 

Assuaged, the delight, the fascination

Ought to be abated,

But longing looks and lustful thoughts know much more

Will come. But that has been X-rated.