Tally Marks

Tally marks on life’s wall,

One, two, three, four,

Strike through.

Depressing mostly,

Days and year

In review.

Who likes to see

The wall gouged so,

Not I.

But inevitability,

Like the strikes,

Circles the calendar,

We go on.

The one day,

The only one,

(apart from birthdays!)

When a settled desolation

Holds heart in its hands

And questions all.

Strike this one through,

Willingly,

Bearing in mind,

That the very young,

Hope constant in their hearts,

Needing no reminder,

Celebrate new years

And birthdays

As growth marks

On the way forward.

Perhaps we have just forgotten,

Every day,

Even this one,

Is a gift.

So I’ll dance

With the very young,

Partake of their libation,

Joie de vivre,

Happy in all days

And years.

Tally marks unknown.

May Music, Day 2 – Fairground Attraction

So Twindaddy wants to know which song I associate with my last ex-boyfriend.

Slight problem.

My last ex- boyfriend is my husband of nearly 27 years. How did that happen? Don’t ask me. I was enjoying the rollercoaster at the time.

Every time.

Every. Single. Time.

From that first meeting.

Every time you looked.

Came near.

Dared to speak.

Every time.

 

The possibility.

I clenched,

knuckles white,

rode the slow ride,

a semi-death,

anticipating climax

in descent.

 

Every single time.

A fairground attraction.

 

Deathly fear in

chamber of horrors

that today,

this moment,

would be

the last today.

 

Waltzers spinning…..

 

…..whirling mind…..

wondering,

Is this love?

 

Then we would ride

rollercoaster.

Up, Up, Up!

Neverending upness…..

…..till that peak.

 

A descent of

 

Was this love?

 

I wondered.

I queried.

I asked

of someone,

anyone.

Was this love?

 

I begged for answers

to an inevitable future.

No right or wrong  way

of reckoning.

 

I wondered.

I queried.

I dismissed.

We paused.

 

We dated again;

the question ever present.

Was this love?

Was this

Animal?

 

We talked.

Is this love?

 

I heard her then.

Asking my questions…..

…..in a pub…..

…..in Glasgow.

 

And I asked,

Is this love?

 

We looked.

Paused forever

over

possible ever

or never.

And married

six months later.